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Posted by MRN on June 11, 2023 at 23:45:29

In Reply to: Re: Walking home all dripping wet, in my kaftan and umbrella dress, after my swim at the public pool just now :) posted by Squishy Plushie on June 11, 2023 at 21:54:09:

As children, the world is filled with mystery and wonder that slowly evaporates as we learn more and more about everything around us. You will never truly get your childhood freedom and innocence back, but life still has opportunities of course. When lockdown started in 2020, I started talking walks in random directions from the village where I live, no phone, no map, no idea where I would end up, and that was really enjoyable, even alone. It couldn’t last, as I know where everywhere within walking range is now! (20 mile round trip is around a 7.5 mile radius.) However, the more I pushed my range, the more places I could reach (but with a sketch of a map!)

I don’t have a car and don’t drive, which is why it helps to have good walking shoes! Just visiting Batford Springs is something like 13 miles round trip (but 15.5 miles on Saturday as I went the long way around since it was not my original destination).

As adults, we easily end up jaded, and it feels like, if anything, we become more afraid and less daring. We learn from our mistakes, but mistakes seem to be an inevitability in fun, even to the point of death sometimes. I was always fearful though, and still am, and unless you happen to find a special someone to share your life with, you can miss out on a lot.

Not being a driver is one of my limitations, and there are lots more. It’s certainly possible for me to become psychologically intoxicated—no actual alcohol, but to simply be pulled at least partially out of my inhibitions—but the danger there is opening myself up to situations that I will not be able to handle afterwards. I don’t want the shame of them suddenly finding out that “sober” I’m a loser, or to cause them the pain of leading them on if it should transpire that we are not morally compatible.

Now, normal folk have all their own fears of course: it’s perfectly normal to be shy and afraid, but often times such fears are unfounded because you and they are compatible on moral, philosophical and social terms.

My shell is not so much an failure as it is a protection mechanism to stop me from losing complete control of myself and going haywire (I have done some really weird and stupid things in years by, so far with no harm done but what on EARTH was I thinking?). In the company of someone special, someone you trust, someone whose core beliefs align with yours, that protection is no longer necessary as you’re safe, and you can go wild together and regain the happiness you were missing out on. In theory, although even then I still need some kind of stabilising force!

Follow Ups:

Re: Walking home all dripping wet, in my kaftan and umbrella dress, after my swim at the public pool just now :) Squishy Plushie 00:31:06 6/12/2023 (6)
- Re: Walking home all dripping wet, in my kaftan and umbrella dress, after my swim at the public pool just now :) MRN 21:20:22 6/12/2023 (5)
  - Re: Walking home all dripping wet, in my kaftan and umbrella dress, after my swim at the public pool just now :) Squishy Plushie 22:07:37 6/12/2023 (4)
    - Re: Walking home all dripping wet, in my kaftan and umbrella dress, after my swim at the public pool just now :) MRN 05:21:51 6/14/2023 (3)
      - Re: Walking home all dripping wet, in my kaftan and umbrella dress, after my swim at the public pool just now :) Squishy Plushie 10:46:30 6/14/2023 (2)
        
        Re: Walking home all dripping wet, in my kaftan and umbrella dress, after my swim at the public pool just now :) MRN 19:03:52 6/14/2023 (1)
        
        Re: Walking home all dripping wet, in my kaftan and umbrella dress, after my swim at the public pool just now :) Squishy Plushie 20:06:02 6/14/2023 (0)

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